I do not have to do it alone...

What a crazy few weeks!  Two weeks ago, my dad had to have an emergency appendectomy, both of my aunts were out of town, so my mom and I were responsible for helping care for my grandma.  I have learned a lot during this time, mostly life lessons, and but a few funny things as well.

 Just because I can do it all by myself, doesn't mean I should.  Also, delegation is very different from sitting back and watching people do my work for me.

We'd planned a week ahead to have an ice cream social at my house to celebrate my good friend Charlotte.  It worked out that the party fell the day after Dad's surgery.  Because I had been at the ER and with my grandma Friday, I wasn't able to get as much of the cleaning done like I had wished.  But, because I was determined to do so, I spent several hours to get the house in order.  During this time, I had two offers for assistance.  I did not accept these offers, though, because I was determined to provide a party for everyone to enjoy. Why should my guests have to work?  So, I was rather tired by the time the party started and groaned audibly when I saw one of the guests brought Risk.  Fortunately, my sarcastic sense of humor kicked in to save my guests from embarrassment.
Application: When people offer help and the task at hand is easily divided, take them up on it.  If they didn't actually want their offer of help accepted, they won't offer next time!

The Holy Spirit is a very good cook!

When cooking, I frequently have people telling me to follow my instincts.  In general, this is good advice.  I can call on past experiences, knowledge about good flavor combinations, etc. to increase and improve my current dish's flavor profile.   Throughout my past weeks (were they really only two?) of cooking, I kept relying on a little voice that wasn't "me."  I'd want to add something more to a dish because it was seemingly flat, but I would not because that authoritative voice told me to hold back.  This meal would go over well, especially for the convalescing patient.  But, He advises on more than how to make good hospital food.  Yes, He even guides the making of smoothies and helps improve existing "go-to"/"signature" dishes.  My stove-top (rather than oven-baked) curry chicken, for instance, was the best I've ever made.  My instincts told me to put in a can of diced tomatoes and increase the chicken broth, but the voice said to just stick with coconut milk throughout the cooking process.  What an enjoyable cooking experience!  I partnered with God to make supper!  What a simple yet profound time.

When unsettled feelings and anxiousness take over, turn on some Third Day (or whatever is appropriate), grab a tissue if desired, and plop down supine.

  

"Your Love, Oh Lord," "King of Glory," and "Agnus Dei/Worthy" provided me with a good refocus time and got me through a day where I was convinced I was going to explode (which would have been messy and just another thing I'd have had to deal with...).  This was the most important lesson I (re)learned.  I'm not exactly sure it was, but I think it was Martin Luther, who would spend hours in prayer daily.  The more tasks he had to complete in the day, the more time he spent in prayer.  When I first heard this several years ago, my practical mind thought it strange.  Now I understand.  The more hectic a day will be, the more overwhelming a task seems, the more I need to make sure I spend time focused solely on God so I can go through my day partnered with Him and His peace.  I feel called to be a beacon of peace and tranquility.  I don't know how well I succeed at that normally.  However, I know I certainly, utterly fail when I figuratively, and somewhat literally, plow over people with an attitude of "don't even talk to me!  I have to get this, this, and this--oh, and don't forget this--done!"  

 "Your love, LORD, reaches to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies. Your righteousness is like the highest mountains, your justice like the great deep."

 Psalm 36:5-6a

Seeing the Bible in a New Light--Despite not Seeing/Hearing Philip Mantofa

I opened my Bible today to read the assigned chapter for this weeks homegroup.  I began reading the meaty Luke 15  (actually, I started with Luke 20 because I remembered incorrectly, but it all worked out because they tied in well together).  As I started the chapter, I was struck with a realization.  The Bible is God's love letter to His people!  I've heard something to this extent several times before, but today it struck me as real.  God is revealing His thoughts and character to me!  And He tells and shows His love for me, and gives me guidance, direction, and conviction when necessary.  I continued reading into chapter 16 and parts of 17 and realized I had some chores to get  done before I needed to leave. But, how could I walk away from God's Word--especially now that I see it in a new light?!  I skimmed a few more verses and set down my Bible.  While I emptied the dishwasher, I remembered I can take God with me! I have His Holy Spirit in me.  I can talk to and with Him.  And I can call upon memorized verses for encouragement, etc.  So, while time with my Bible is lovely and wonderful and necessary, I abide in Christ and abides Christ in me!

It is good to make new realizations and be reminded of old ones.

Cookbooks and following God's recipe

Here is a wall of text for those of you who missed me! :).

I'm sorry it has been a while.  I hope to remedy the posting droughts by properly refocusing my blog and posting what I feel like I should rather than over-analyzing everything.  So, from now on,  instead of feeling like every post has to be amazingly deep and profound, I will feel free to publish book reviews, quotes from books or articles, Bible verses from my readings that strike me for some reason, and, potentially, cooking updates!

I'm particularly excited about that last one.  While deliberating/fighting with God about what in the world I was going to do if I wasn't in school, He told me I was going to cook and bake cookies, particularly oatmeal raisin cookies.  In  case you did not know, oatmeal raisin cookies are evil.  Prior to God's voicing His plan in regards to this, I once got so angry at a batch of oatmeal raisin cookies that just weren't turning out (despite it being the exact same recipe that I had used before that had turned out wonderfully...) I reached into a 350 degree oven bare-handed to pull out a tray of said defective cookies.  So, yes, when God told me that I was going to be spending a lot of time with the most demonic baked good in existence, I became even less happy.  But when He told me that I could and should buy cookbooks, I brightened.  I love books.  A lot.  And I enjoy food.  I enjoy gardening and growing food, preparing it, cooking and baking it, talking about it, giving it to people, and eating it.  My family is like this, too.  We plan vacations around food.  We will find out about a restaurant and plan a vacation to the area, looking for other things to do while there (the buffet at Mrs. Yoder's Kitchen in Mt. Hope, OH is really good if you want some Amish food.  Nearby, there is the Walnut Creek Cheese Factory: a bulk food store with jellies, jams, and cheeses, too.  P. Graham Dunn is a nice place to stop on the way to the area.  We make this day trip at least once a year.).  

Anyway, I kind of forgot about buying cookbooks.  This was one type of book I didn't really know how to buy because the market is filled with so many different types and qualities.  So, I decided to make use of the Internet instead of physical books.  I began following blogs and became not the first person to discover Heidi Swanson of 101 Cookbooks.  As I became a dedicated follower, she announced the upcoming publishing of her new book Super Natural Every Day.  I was pendulous about purchasing it but eventually decided in favor of doing so.  Guess what?  It came today!  Guess what else?  Today started out as one of the roughest I have had in a long time!  So, I wasn't overly thrilled with its arrival and drug it inside along with the other large boxes from Amazon containing  our next few months supply of Izze drinks.

I was feeling frustrated with several people and with life in general.  Thus, I set about my day with a bad attitude.  As my frustration faded, I became more and more light-headed to the point I was seeing stars even after standing for a long period of time.  I lay down and rested for a bit, and that helped, so long as I didn't move any part of my body and stared straight at the ceiling.  I fought through it to get some food and lemon water.  At this point, my insightful boyfriend asked me via text message how I was doing and, upon receiving my answer, suggested I put on worship music and think about for what I was thankful.  Good advice.  I didn't want to do it, but after I finished my snack I did.  It morphed into a quiet worship session. I discovered many of my problems stemmed from a temporary state of rebellion.  I didn't realize I was in such a state.  At the point of writing this, I do not know what I was rebelling against, but now that I have come out of it, I realize I was.  My chosen attire for the day, the music I had been blaring, my thoughts, and my feelings were all negative and rebellious.

The hold broke, I no longer felt dizzy and weak, but quiet and joyful.  I grabbed the package containing my cookbook.  I felt excited once I got it in my hands, I opened it, and a great joy swept over me that I had to share in my little corner of the Internet.  During my time praying to God, I had complained yet again about how I didn't feel like how I was doing anything worthwhile--just sitting around at home doing nothing (why did You do this to me again?).  And I complained about my apparent inability to do anything outside the home without being forced into a recovery day.  What I consider a busy day is considered to be an easy one by most people ("well...I had to go to the store to pick up some stuff, go to the library to drop off books, and to the bank to make an ATM withdrawal.  Now I'm exhausted. No, I'm not sick: I've always been like this!  Seriously!").  I madly asked God why He made me "defective."  In hindsight, I find this to be funny in a sad way.  Here I was telling the perfect Being who made me that He did it wrongly--"God, You screwed up!"  But, He patiently told me that there was nothing wrong with me, that He made me to be a homebody so I could effectively minister there, no one is defective when living according to His plan, and that I should go open my cookbook so I could enjoy expanding my knowledge while working to improve my food ministry.  Now, I am going to warm up some supper and do just that.